Rise of the Planet of the ... Manipulative Bitch Apes?

Evil Mad Scientists have continued to play god. And not in the fun "space modulator" kind of way either, but by implanting human cells in mice to make "monsters."  That's the actual word used in the (regrettably short) report.  MONSTERS.

Worse, there are apparently plans in the works to "humanize" monkeys:

"The fear is that if you start putting very large numbers of human brain cells into the brains of primates suddenly you might transform the primate into something that has some of the capacities that we regard as distinctively human.. speech, or other ways of being able to manipulate or relate to us,"

Why was the world not warned about plans to make monkeys that could "manipulate... us?"  I mean, a violent overthrow? Yeah sure, I can kinda see that we've got this coming.  We've been pissing on the rest of the animal kingdom for millenia.

But I will not abide a passive aggressive monkey. "Sure, I'll get my damn dirty paws off you.  It's not like I'm a human and can lord over my genetic cousins or anything.  I'll just go to the kitchen and eat a banana.  It's all I'm good for anyway, right?  Right!?!"

And don't even get me started on the kludge emails they'd send.  "Forward this if you believe in Dr. Rosenbaum, the savior of the monkey race who made it possible for us to stop flinging poo and start writing emails to our lazy kids who never call anymore."

I will personally destroy the planet before I allow one more manipulative bitch into my life.  Some we're born to deal with, some we can good and god damn well avoid.